Enslaved: Odyssey to the West

- extremely cringe character design, the moment I saw the protagonist I was wondering "hes gonna put a shirt on right? " bad dialogue, cliche forced 'romance', trite story

- game mechanics are barebones and handhold casual shit.  the 'platforming' is a total joke. imagine if in Mario all you do is hold a direction and spam jump button and you cant fail. thats the platforming in this. its rediculously simplistic. it looks like your character is doing all sorts of crazy acrobatics but in reality youre holding a direction and spamming 'jump' with no chance of failure.

- besides the platforming the only other real mechanic is a barebones modern game design batman style beat em up. mash button for light attack, then hit button for strong attack. dodge button, block button. really boring and generic. the game is so god damn linear you cant even jump off platforms where you want. there isnt actually a standalone 'jump' button. you can only jump at very specific designated points. if you are on a ledge and you want to drop down, you cant just jump off the ledge. you have to walk specifically in the 'here is the scripted jump part' and toggle it. IT SUCKS. it barely feels like gameplay. you dont feel like youre actually playing the game half the time, just engaging in a series of dumb fucking scripts.

- WAY TOO MANY CUTSCENES. the control of the character is constatnly taken away. I don't mean story based cutscenes, like every 40 seconds some new script will trigger that will show you something or spin the camera around or show you some enemy spawn or show you x. its nonstop. the game is so fucking scripted its painful.

- weak forced in upgrade system where you can upgrade health/shield/'combat moves' which are almost entirely pointless, and your 'gun' staff that shoots lasers. i mean the whole game is fucking stupid.  your staff shoots lasers. its retarded.

- game feels like its PG13 designed by a bunch of housewives or something. the overly saturated disney looking color pallette, the rediculous shirtless buff main character with dragon ball Z hair, the cliche 'le strong but dumb man'  and 'le weak but really smart haxor woman' its just so cheesy and cringe. the dialogue is embarrasing at times.

- enemy design is really boring. its all just metallic mechs. some of them shoot at you so you have to run around taking cover trying to advance towards them to kill them, the others are just melee robots. i never find it fun engaging or satisfying killing robots in any game. its about the worst enemy type in any game ever. i hate robot enemies they are just plain boring to engage and it feels like they only used them in this game to be more PG13

- the story is retarded and i figured out the plot twist like 2 hours in. theres really unfitting real life photographs randomly shoved into your vision and it just looks stupid as hell. the ending has the most obvious but '2deep4u philosophical dilemma plot twist'  when really its the most shallow surface level shit ever.  also it uses a real life video of a man and  looks absolutely stupid in the context of the disney like graphics of the game.


- not really much good to say about this game, it was only about 7 hours long and it felt too long. i was just waiting for it to be over. it felt like a drag. the mechanics do not evolve. like I said you either have REALLY shallow handholding 'platforming'  or you have really generic and boring beat em up.  there are some boss fights and they were probably the most fun in the whole game but they were still underwhelming and most of them just involve hitting switches and shooting at X which barely even feel like a boss. theres this stupid hoverboard mechanic that you have to use sometimes that just feels like a massive gimmick. the graphics are OK but the artstyle is SHIT. some of the vistas are nice to look at and sometimes the color pallette is nice but like I said the character designs and the enemy designs are just so awful. the plot is awful. the cliche generic 'romance' is awful. the PC port also sucks and has low framerate drops and stutter. keyboard and mouse does not work properly it feels like its emulating a joystick. so I just used controller. not a good experience overall.

4/10